I recently realized that I still "have" a blog. That is- there is a place on the internet that still does contain some random thoughts of mine and is now just lingering out there in the ethos- unfinished.
So I had come back to officially delete everything and even went so far as selecting all posts and was about to click delete, and then I thought- why not give it another go?
The reality of my life is that it is not regular. I don't go to an office everyday where I have regular internet access wher I can jaunt ideas and thoughts at whim. I don't even sit at home everyday with a routine of say: coffee, breakfast, dishes, dogs, meeting a girl friend for this or that, whatever...I'm irregular at best.
I work as a nurse- so on days I work, I get up about 6am, leave by 6:30 and then get back home around 8pm- just in time to catch up on the day with my husband and go to bed for the next workday (or if not, then we go out or watch a movie and therefore-no sitting around on the computer blogging. ) On nights that I work I usually sleep the day before and after, and while during the night I might have time to sit down, I am usually wanting to either talk to the nurse next to me, or eat.
When I am not working I have time - but by the time that I have cleaned the apartment and feel recuperated from being gone from the world for 3 days, I don't feel like sitting inside or anywhere- I want to go see the world, so I usually go to shops, ride my scooter, and take my dogs on a walk, etc. Instead of sitting on my computer at home.
Excuses aside. I am going to try to do this once again because I feel that it is somewhat healthy for people to write and that is something that I do very little of. I think that writing (of any sort) causes people to pause in one place and most of the time, evaluate what they are thinking, feeling, and what they believe. I am not sure if most people believe something before they say/write it, or if in writing and saying, they find their belief. But as for me, my soul finds nourishment in retrospection, in writing and talking about what has happened in my life and how I feel about it.
As of late, a lot has happened. I feel overwhelmed about the possibility of divulging such a gross amount of random happenings. The amount that I have not thought about, and the amount of reflection that sits before me seems daunting. So maybe just one?
Where to live. ?
Matt and I had previously settled on purchasing a house on 9th street in Durham, NC. since then, we have been living in 1/3 of the house in an apartment we are renting. We had a contract and were going to be ready to close this past September. Not so. Bank of America decided at the last minute we would need 25% down instead of 5%. I'm not sure of their confusion- but it did cause a hiccup that in turn caused a thoought, and a rethought. and a canceling of the contract. (cold feet?) Since then Matt has set his eyes about 25 minutes north of down town - on a little farm in Hurdle Mills.
As we have been living in Durham for almost a year now, and have been contemplating buying here because the thought of renting makes me want to puke. money wasted! It is hard though, because there are SO MANY contributing factors to a decision like adding on another loan to your life- the liability. Here are the factors - not being pros or cons, but just facts that seem to matter.
-I really like living on 9th street because people are always walking and running by with dogs, etc. and to go to the shops down the street.
-Matt doesn't like living in Durham because people take his stuff. aka. our ar has been broken into twice and his hand tools are stolen/borrowed regularly at work.
-I really like living about 1 mile from where I work all the amenities I need because I can scoot everywhere.
-We both want to buy a house because I think renting is a waste of money.
-Taking on another loan is a huge responsibility.
-Matt and I have never lived in one place longer than 9 months together and typically "get the itch" every 6 months. (which I did already experience about 1 month ago in a sort of short wave)
-Matt wants to live in the country on a farm, with horses, cows, and pigs.
-If i live on a farm, I want a goat.
-We need a bigger back yard or more land for Callie (our little catahoula) to run around on.
-Our goal is to completely own our place of residence before we have children.
alright, I'm thinking this is all I can do for now.
